Sunday, September 30, 2007

The Ego Trap

I was listening to an audio book the other day which aptly describes what an ego is. The ego is based upon beliefs you have about yourself and how you project these beliefs into the world. The ego is built on past experiences and by lessons learned which defines who the person thinks they are today. The key word here is ‘thinks’; who you think you are and who you actually are maybe two completely different things.

Albert Einstein’s famous quote below fits with the description of what an ego is. “Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.” Suffice to say, the ego is knowledge based and is very limiting when it comes to D/s relationships.

Many submissive men, and this sometimes includes My spirit, have what I call the male ego trap. They have this idea of what a being a submissive male is but can become conflicted when they think about societal or cultural ideals of what they believe a man should be. Key word here is ‘should’. It is proven in patriarchal societies that male dominance has lead cultures and countries down destructive, war ridden paths. The male ego is primarily based on taking with little giving back. When the male ego arises in a D/s relationship it can be a real deal breaker, depending on the strength of the connection the submissive has with his Mistress. With the Mistress’ guidance, the male ego can be tempered if not completely crushed with beneficial effects within the D/s relationship as well as in his vanilla world. In fact, with his ego out of the way, the male can be open to who he truly can become in all areas. It is truly a liberating experience to be free of the ego trap, to be free of all the self judgments and condemnations with ones self. It can be a lengthy process to achieve this state of mind but one every submissive male should aspire to.

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