Monday, March 12, 2007

Training Strategies – Control of the Body

It is a sad fact that many submissives, who are so adept at caring for others, neglect their own wellbeing at times. It is part of a Mistress’ task in training such a person is to instill good habits in matters of food, sleep, and exercise, and not to encourage self-destruction. If the Mistress notices that the submissive is negligent in matters of self-care, she should take steps to remedy the situation. This can be accomplished from within the scene. For example, the Mistress may wish to reward the submissive for taking care of himself by allowing him to perform foot worship for Her or whatever worship She may desire.

The Mistress may also like to control the sub’s sleep, speech, and excretory functions, but great care should be taken not to exhaust the sub or endanger his health with such games.

The question of sexual abstinence for sub’s frequently arises. Assuming that the sub has turned this right over to the Mistress during negotiation, I believe that a Mistress may act with impunity in restricting a sub's sexual pleasure. A state of sexual hunger drives slaves to better performance, and the promise of release is a powerful stimulant. If the Mistress finds that the slave is unable to resist the temptation to masturbate, She may want to invest in one of the fine chastity belts or "cock cages" now available.

I am aware of no concrete evidence that sexual abstinence causes any problem other than frustration. Remind the sub that his sexual desire, like all else, is your property and should be dedicated to your pleasure, not the submissive.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

After Care

The most important part of any scene, and sometimes the most neglected part, is the after care of a submissive as he/she comes out of their sub space. Depending on how deep the submissive sinks, the after care time can be as short as 10 minutes or sometimes up to and beyond a half an hour. When the after care is inadequate, sometimes it can negate the whole experience of the scene. It may even make it more difficult for the Mistress to drop the submissive drop into their sub space as the sub becomes distrustful and unsure of the full experience of the scene. It is the Mistress’ responsibility to enhance that bond of trust with the sub with every scene. Thoughtful after care is the perfect way to do this.

When I scene with spirit, I try to make sure that I have put enough time aside to assure that there is ample time for proper after care. Yesterday spirit was sort of on the edge of his top space all day. We haven’t been able to spend as much time with each other as we used to due to conflicting work schedules, so any time spent in a scene is enjoyable way to spend some quality time together. With a penetrating look and a commanding tone, I was able to take spirit down a level with little difficulty. Within no time, he was willing to do whatever I desired. his other persona, L’il Asha, hasn’t shown herself lately so I decided it was time to bring her out for the evening. The previous night we had been shopping and we picked up some new breasts for Asha which generously enhance her look. I played dress up with Asha, and she received a few new items with grateful anticipation, a pair of lacy panties, a silky green teddy and silky navy camisole. When Asha is out she can be a naughty girl who enjoys a good flogging. I always find it wondrous that I can bring Asha out or take spirit to these places deep in his mind, to find that happy place where he/she can just ‘be’. However bringing them back in a loving way is usually more on My mind. Lots of love, cuddles, and gentle sentiments to let him know that I accept all of him is always a part of My after care for spirit. he still battles with his male ego and societal standards when it comes to Asha. With love and support, My wish is for him to accept himself as much as I accept him. Perhaps with continued loving after care when we scene, he will discover that within himself.

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