Sunday, September 17, 2006

Balance in Vanilla Life & D/s

The last few weeks have been a very stressful time in our vanilla lives once again. I am in the process of looking for new work while working and spirit is working now too. With new schedules to work around, there hasn’t been much free time to scene or connect profoundly on a D/s level. Vanilla life was starting to encroach full time in our lives which left us both moody and restless. We both knew that we needed to find the balance between the vanilla and D/s aspects but were too angry with each other to take the time to figure out how. As Mistress, I knew it was up to Me to get a grip of the situation and help spirit realign to his submissive nature.

spirit was having a difficult time transitioning with his work self and his submissive self. When he came home from work, he was resistive to duties that he normally would cheerfully perform and would question instructions for tasks that I would give to him. he would try to top from the bottom on many occasions with feelings of guilt later. I would become angry with this behaviour and flip out, with the result of Myself feeling very un-Mistress like and unhappy. The endless power struggles were exhausting and damaging the bond that we had strived so hard to develop. We both needed an attitude adjustment.

As for Myself, I needed to relax & calm down before I could take any steps to rectify the situation. I needed to feel grounded again in My role. Reading D/s literature and connecting with other Mistress’ online helped. I found that I am not so alone with coping with this imbalance issue. Living a 24/7 D/s relationship has its challenges with this being one of the biggest ones; how to create and maintain the strong bond with you submissive with lasting results.

Once I felt back in My natural Mistress state, I started to give direction once again to spirit. Attitude is everything, and spirit could tell I was back with My vocal tone, My body language & My demeanor. Any bad behaviour on his part would not be tolerated. Within a few moments of speaking with spirit, he dropped from his top space into his mid-space, something that I was unable to do within the last few weeks. It felt very rewarding. spirit had returned to his happy place, a place where he feels cared for, deeply loved and devotedly submissive. Balance for both of us had once again been achieved. Sometimes this lifestyle can be a challenge but in the end, it is so very worth it. When we finally had time to scene, it was a very gratifying experience. I’ll fill you in on those details another time ;).

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Puppy Play

In the last few weeks I have been able to bring out another aspect of spirit’s personality…his inner puppy. he had mentioned to Me many times that he had role-played online in Furry rooms but I didn’t really understand exactly what it all entailed, (no pun intened)!

After doing a bit of research on the net, I discovered that online Furry or Furries rooms are chat rooms where people role-play being all sorts of animals, creating worlds and sometimes full-on lifestyles. We’re talking about real-time communities here. Specifically, communities of people built loosely around the idea that they aren’t really people at all, but instead are, um, "furries." They are the sort of folk who are getting in touch with their inner kinkajous, if you will. They hang out together, and there are more of them than you might think. Since spirit had interest in exploring this avenue, I decided that I was up to the challenge to see if I could take him to his own ‘puppy’ space.

spirit had no idea what I had in mind when I stood at the living room entrance with his collar in-hand. I called him over and put him in his greeting position to receive his collar. With a hug and a kiss, I lead him over to our couch and had him sit on it as he waited in anticipation of what I had planned. I started to lightly kiss him on the lips, ever so delicately and pulling away quickly with eyes wide open staring into his. Within 10 minutes of this, his pupils were dilating and slightly rolling up as his lips were quivered with longing, only just getting a taste of what was to come. he started to make soft moans almost a whimpering as I asked him who owns him. “You Mistress, You own me, forever & always.” “That’s right spirit, I own you in ALL ways, and I want to meet someone new tonight” I say to him in a hushed tone. “Who Mistress, who are You to meet?” he says, concern clouding his eagerness. “I know that there is someone other aspect of yourself that is wanting to come out tonight…I will call him Miko, My puppyboy.” his eyes widen when he realizes the intent of what I have just said. As he descends into deeper into his sub-space, his mind stops functioning in a habitual manner. Conscious thought diminishes as he trains his ears on the soothing sounds that I am whispering. Throughout this whole process, I am gazing deeply into his eyes, slowly putting him in a blissful trance, a new play space where he feels completely secure, loved and happy. I say to spirit that he is not allowed to speak human language any more. he must try to show Me what he wants and only gently ‘woof’ to get My attention. he nods his understanding. I continue to kiss him but I want My ‘puppy’ to give his Mistress some good licks, to please Her in the way She enjoys the most. he eagerly goes to task as I encourage My ‘puppy’ to please Me with numerous ‘What a good doggie Miko is’ phrases. When I am fully satisfied, I have him lay beside Me as I stroke his head in My lap, lovingly caressing his body. As he slowly rises from this new space, he feels vaguely embarrasses but exhilarated at the same time. I re-emphasize that I love ALL aspects of who spirt is with Miko just being one of the many.

I find it heartening that I have the ability to take spirit to all his deep and somewhat buried ‘happy’ spaces. By exploring them in a safe environment and with My assistance, he can discover all his hidden passions. It is comforting for him to know that I am in full support of all the discoveries that we will be uncovering in the weeks and months ahead. I look forward to every new one.

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