Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Are you worthy?

Get into the groove, boy you’ve gotta prove yourself to Me. Ok, so it’s a twist on Madonna’s radio version, but doesn’t that phrase totally fit into O/our D/s lifestyle? It’s about the worthiness of a submissive and how he has to maintain that level of approval with his Mistress.

Once a sub jumps through all the hoops to actually become collared submissive, you would think that he would do everything in his power to maintain that bond. Sadly, this isn’t always the case. Some feel that by being collared, the goal has been attained. others, especially if they have the honor of being married to their Mistress, feel that there commitment level is confirmed by their wedding ring. They do not see it as journey. Oh, how wrong that attitude is. Don’t submissive men realize that they can be married to their Mistress but she doesn’t have to have them as a submissive if their service to her slides and/or completely diminishes? No where is it written that a Mistress can not ‘un-collar’ her subby hubby and have him in Her life as regular husband. After all, it is her right to do so. She may even perhaps decide to look for other male submissives who will worship and serve Her as She should be served. I suppose this could be considered a mild version of cockholding.

When Mistress takes Her time to properly train a submissive who in consideration for being collared, it is up to him to learn from Her training all that he can and be ready & willing to serve Her in whatever way She decides. Many men find this reality difficult and very different from the fantasy they had envisioned until the time of truth arrives. That magical moment, when they finally become ‘owned’, the goal every submissive desires can fade fast if the motivation behind the submissive is self-centered instead of selfless. A submissive must prove himself worthy on a regular, if not, daily basis in order to preserve to relationship that he is forming with his Mistress or face the prospects of replacement.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

10 Rules for a Mistress

I saw this posted in one of the groups that I belong to. I find it to be a true and concise list for any Mistress to use as guildline in Her D/s relationships.

For a Successful Mistress

1. Control the orgasm, and you control the male.

2. To make any fantasy work, you must build suspense in your submissive.

3. Stimulation plus frustration equals service and submission.

4. Every submissive will try to test the limits of your Rule. Never let him get away with anything. He needs you to be both firm and consistent.

5. Physical pain alone cannot satisfy a submissive. (A masochist, yes.)

6. The more aroused your submissive is, the more pain he can take.

7. The more effective your psychological Dominance, the less pain you will need to inflict to control and satisfy your submissive.

8. All punishment is a balance between intensity and duration. More intense pain should last less time; if you want to prolong the punishment, use less intense stimulation.

9. Submission increases with time. As long as you maintain firm control, the longer a session lasts, the more thoroughly submissive your male will become.

10. Your control and pleasure are inextricably intertwined with his submission and pleasure.

Thursday, May 18, 2006


The other weekend I wanted to practice some anal training with spirit. I have a strap-on that I love to take him with but as of late O/our infrequent sessions have left him too tensed up to take it. It was time for him to remember the pleasure he had been missing.

I asked spirit to wait for Me in the bedroom, naked and in his punishment position which swiftly sinks him down from his top space to his nice submissive mid space. I feel that should really change O/our opening ritual sometimes, mix it up a bit. But it works so well that part of Me thinks,‘if it’s not broken, don’t fix it’. I always enjoy seeing him like this, eyes full of anticipation of what I’m going to do next, something that might be painful but always pleasurable. I tell him to get off the bed and to go & kneel on his hands & knees on a towel that I have placed on the floor near the bathroom. In order to fully appreciate his anus, it must be prepared properly, starting with an enema. he becomes shy & embarrassed as he realizes My intention but yields to Me, as always. I have learned not to fill the bag too full, only to 2/3’s of the way so the water will clean him but will not be too much of a discomfort when it is being held in his colon and the surrounding area. I make him hold the water for a full 5 minutes which can seem like forever but it is necessary for him to be clean and relaxed. I then allow him discharge the water & waste and let him finish cleaning himself up in the washroom while I wait and prepare the toys for the scene.

he comes to Me on his knees willing to do anything that I desire of him, just the way I like it. I tell him to get on the bed,his behind high in the air so I can inspect him. I grab his balls and tie them up in a hot pink silk scarf that I have just for that purpose. They look so charming, all dressed up and hanging like little plums. I lube up My finger & slowly insert it into his rectum while the other hand is holding his shaft. he shivers as I move My finger in & out. A long stream of clear fluid soon appears as it drips out of the head of his penis as I massage his prostrate, effectively milking him. he moans in frustration but enjoys this as the same time. When I feel he is relaxed enough I withdraw My finger and I put on the strap-on as I tell him what I’m going to do next. I know he wants it, he loves Me taking him, but there is always a small part of him that rebels, an offence to his male ego. As I ignore his weak pleas, I mount him with the lubed up black dong. Slowly, inch by inch, he takes it, but I can not, will not fully insert it. he is still not ready to take it all yet. But then that is what training is all about...practicing what will one day become second nature. Even so, I pump him as I can, while leaning down and grabbing his shaft with My other hand. That is part of the training too. W/we both know that the little head rules the big head. Any pleasure that comes to the little one will be remembered by the big one. As I pump a bit deeper and as his moans become louder, My hand is moving along his shaft bringing him closer to oblivion. I am at the deepest point when he climaxes, still only 1/2 way in…but it is enough.

spirit is spent, a quivering mass of flesh which needs to be comforted and held as all the emotional build up over the past few months is released. Like a babe in his mother’s arms, his head against My breast, he let’s go of all the stress that he has been clinging on to for dear life. Fresh & cleansed, W/we can both face the new obstacles surrounding O/our lives in O/our journey in D/s.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Back in the saddle again

Life is starting to flow once more as I return to the road of wellness. spirit has been a strong, ever present part of My renewal process. With him by My side during this phase of the journey, My strength & desire returned with full force. I was fortunate to be able to take some time off from work and spend 10 days with spirit which was delightful. Many mornings were spent together with intimate play with the promise of more to come. I was hoping to see L’il Asha during My that time, but she unfortunately didn’t make an appearance. I did a couple of light scenes with spirit, that were peppered with lots of teasing in between. W/we were able to take in some local sites and do a couple of day trips. It was a terrific time for U/us to deepen the bond that W/we already share. I will elaborate on a few of O/our scenes in the next few posts.

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