Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Moving in & moving on

Today is the day that spirit is moving in, a day which W/we have been looking forwards to for a long time. W/we had been talking about this move for a while but due to his family situation where he was staying at it wasn’t an option. But now his family is aware of O/our wonderful relationship, in a vanilla way of course, and they are accepting of it. W/we are well on O/our way of attaining O/our goals and a beautiful life together.

W/we spent most of last weekend together and W/we had such a great time. A group of U/us went out to a Latin dance club to celebrate a friend’s birthday. It was so much fun and spirit is such a good dancer. A friend of Mine that was there who hadn’t seen Me in about 7 months or so said to Me that I looked so good, looked really relaxed & happy, and ‘are you in love?’ Gosh, I didn’t know that it was so apparent to everyone but I guess that is exactly what W/we are in. In love and in a 24/7 D/s relationship too. I think one of the things that make a D/s relationship work is not only the compatibility in sexual desires or power exchanges but also in regular vanilla activities, such as going out dancing or to a movie. Any relationship is always about give and take, however, with a D/s relationship there isn’t much of a power struggle (if any) as in a vanilla relationship because those boundaries are firmly in place from the start. But just because I am the Mistress does that give Me absolute power over My sub/partner? No, not at all because it’s not just about Me. Does it mean that My sub is topping from the bottom when I fulfill his desires? No again, because W/we are in a consensual D/s relationship…W/we both are getting something out of O/our chosen lifestyle. In the end, yes, I will make the decisions about whatever needs to be decided but I will not make the decision until I have discussed things over with My sub/partner and make sure it’s good choice for both of U/us. It’s also about balance and if the relationship becomes one sided it’s almost a guarantee that the union will not last. I notice this in many vanilla relationships with the games that are played, how they manipulate each other to try to find a way to get their needs fulfilled without proper communication. When this pattern starts to occur, the relationship disintegrates fairly rapidly to the demise of both parties. It’s a sad state of affairs when that happens and it happens far too often. With a D/s relationship, communication is even more important since limits are being tested and pushed on a regular basis. And I can say is that more D/s couples have deeper, committed relationships because of this level of trust that has been established. Communication is the glue that holds any relationship together as well as having a similar outlook on life.

O/our relationship was special from the start and W/we both recognized that it was something W/we didn’t want to let go of. It was one of the reasons I collared spirit early on in the relationship...no getting away sweetness. As a result, W/we have talked about getting married in the last few months. Now W/we decided that it's time that this should become reality. W/we set a date for February 27th only 4 weeks from now. It will be just a small ceremony at O/our place with a couple of close friends. After the ceremony W/we all will all go to a nice restaurant close to O/our place and celebrate the start of O/our new life together. The old saying is true…when you know you’ve found the right person, you know. W/we are both incredibly happy right now and I’m sure that it will only get better. I love you spirit xxxoo.

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